Drift XVIII. My friend NPH!

Regular weather, slightly humid summer day

Location: a summer camp?

I'm friends with NPH (Neil Patrick Harris) in the dream! We were having lunch at cafeteria table in the camp. And he started talking like he does in How I Met Your Mother. So I reminded him: hey Neil, you're in real life now, stop acting! Then he did something funny in return and all friends at the table burst into laughters...

Ha.Ha.Ha. Does this dream make me a crazy fan of NPH?...

Photo Source: http://nph-fan.com/

 

Drift XVII. The Fight

A nostalgic day

Location: back to old college, but somewhere near the ocean

I returned! Finally! And amongst the crowd I saw her - the girl (Dou) who has been caring about me before, during, and after my departure. We never cut contact, and she has been a source of firm belief for me. I finally saw her again in the dream. I suggested that we take a walk along the beach.

Crossing a basketball field, I got excited, explaining to her that I used to hang out with my basketball friends here, but nowadays kids don't like outdoor games anymore. There happened to be a group of high-schoolers playing, with their fiercely hot female teacher standing next to the court. One of the kid deliberately throw the ball to the wall so that it bounced back and hit Dou's face heavily! I was FURIOUS. The teacher stepped out and spoke in English: fuck off.

Next I know, I dragged her to the ground and beat her up. It felt good. Violence.

Photo Source: http://z-chenlifestime.blogspot.com/

Drift XVI. Run Away

Rainy days

Location: multiple, including Dhaka/Random City in the US/Guangzhou

Act I
I'm a half-African American-half-white girl, with wild orange curly hair. I wore skinny jeans and leather jacket. I lie, cheat, do drugs, but I'm undeniably beautiful and good at core. My boyfriend is very nice to me - and he looks like Bradley Cooper in the dream... I ran away from our apartment again. Before I ran out, I made sure to create a mess, and throw a whole jar of liquid at him - he was still sleeping. I had to run, run away, far. Because I knew I did not deserve this great person.

It was all muddy on the ground, and quickly getting dark. I needed to find a place to stay. Then I thought of X, who looks like Bashar Assad in the dream...In the dream X is a sex-addict. I had no other friends, but I was so reluctant to visit him that I dragged my feet, walked 10+ floors, counting each steps. My high heels knocking each stage. Loud at night.

Found him, he was leaning outside the windows of a classroom, and was engrossed in a movie that was showing to the students. I had his attention. He brought me back to his eerily soft bed. But then he asked me to stay there while he would take the couch outside. - "Aren't you a sex addict? I'd do anything! Just let me stay!" - "No." He said. "I'm sending you back to your boyfriend tomorrow morning."

Act II
Traveling with parents. We were having such great time. But parents looked so much older in the dream. I later realize we were actually in their new house - everything is delicate, clean, expensive yet cozy looking. But I was saddened by how big the house is. So many bedrooms, so many cozy beds. But only dad and mom stay there all year round.

Act III
Traveling with boyfriend (Bradley Cooper-looking guy, haha). We went up to a high mountain, most of it soaked in dense fog. I woke up one morning, looking outside the window and saw a few young Chinese girls - one of them looking shockingly like myself in college! I even recognized the shirt?! Then Realize it WAS me! "I" was hiking with my best friend Maggie and her 215 roomates. Everybody was college-looking. Maggie's braided long hair, Mia's short hair, Monster's glasses... I managed to get their attention, and they looked up. I then push my face to the glass window to make funny expressions. They laughed so much, like we used to. I kept waving, hoping to join them, but I know I could not catch up.

Source: http://raigecreations.blogspot.com/2011/07/into-fog.html

Drift XV. Hello Starry Sky, Howdy Angry Ocean

Dusk and dawn

Location: Old European Style, beautiful antique house, right by the sea

The dream was broken into ridiculous pieces..each with their bizarre implication:

Piece one: the breakup - I was dating, ahem, my dad. Everybody else was grossed out by this, including ourselves. Mom was around us, smiling and appreciating (at least wasn't bothered by) the fact. But dad and I are too different so we decided to break up. I said "think about it, our only future is you and mom have a divorce - and I don't wanna be a child with divorced parents!" his response "fair enough!" It was the easiest breakup ever. [I think this dream happened because: I was reading Hemingway before bed, and dad used to love Hemingway and he kinda resembles the main character in A Farewell to Arms, so I carried the admiration into the dream; my subconscious has also been stressing about the uncertainty of my relationship in reality, which probably has a promising amicable breakup and a dead end]

Piece two: I was with A in N's car, A was flirting with a short-haired blonde girl and doing some nipple twisting. I was simply happy that he's capable of such heavy flirting and the girl seemed to be into him. The scene switched to a picture of C and A both grinning ear to ear at each other, and in the dream I realized that I've already broke up with C. So I sighed and said "oh how I miss your smiles." C walked over, we were suddenly in a ball room, people dancing around us. And he said "I'd love to have you back, what do you think?", his blue eyes looking into my soul. I comfortably rested in the familiar pair of arms, saying I need a little more time. [I think I just really miss C in reality]

Piece three: He found me writing long emails to D, asking if I was cheating on him. I was not, but I did pay too much attention to the emails, and to the elusive person who made me so infatuated. [Every inch of D screams 'danger' to me, as I seem to have found my own soul in another body. I've been obsessed with his travel plans, his guitar, his language, his Shostakovich, Eric Satie, Philip Glass...]

Piece four: I walked out in the night, casually looking up, and saw the most stunning starry night with all colors of stars, milky way, and some recognizable patterns. My jaw dropped, my heart raced, I could not believe my eyes... After a while, when walking past a dock, the ocean began to have some deep turquoise color, some part of it was stormy blue. The color flashes, changes with each rush of wave, like a moving oil painting. The waves grew wilder and wilder with each pulse, and I was thinking to myself: I think I know how to paint the waves now. At the same time I was so afraid because I know it was going to swallow me, yet I cannot help but appreciating the beauty of it. [Oh such a wonderful universe, which my myopic eyes can hardly appreciate enough in reality]

It was absolutely breathtaking.

Drift XIV. The Arrest

A very sunny and hot summer day, morning

Location: A more rustic-looking B-More

I participated in some sort of money laundering, and I knew the cops were coming to me. I ran across floors after floors in the tall building where I worked, trying to escape. But they captured me, right outside a secret emergency exit.

I was taken back to police station, knowing I need to plead. But there seemed to be no way out. I did something wrong, I needed to take the punishment as it is. Do my time.

I probably need to catch up on OITNB in reality...

Drift XIII. Lock the Door Behind You

An early morning

Location: West Baltimore...?

I moved with a friend into a hug apartment complex - beautiful antique style housing, with shared kitchen and living room. Roommates are: 2 Latino guys (they are a cute couple), 1 African American lady with cheerful outlook, 2 other African American guys who like to joke, 1 cool Asian guy who brings girls home a lot. It was the beginning of a new and exciting life!

However, there are 3 doors from front yard to house, and we must always lock them behind (of course I did not know why). One morning I went swimming (without pants, obviously this dream is R-rated). On the way back there were a bunch of people whistling at me and I freaked out. I dashed into our yard, then ran upstairs as fast as I could, completely forgetting about locking the doors behind me!

Next thing I know, they were all inside our building, one is already pounding on our last door, which is merely a screen door for mosquito purpose. Turns out the first floor of our house is the office of a congress woman, and those people are here to protest - sadly, they're not peaceful protestors.

Scared to death, with deep guilt, I saw from my window that futuristic tall robot/buses sent by cops start to push their cars away and trash them. Some people jumped onto one robot/bus to shake it down - but when it fell down, it landed on them, and they were all dead.

I screamed.

Drift XII. Self Sacrifice

A rainy, gloomy afternoon

Location: current apartment

Out of nowhere, I got a deadly communicable disease and needed to end my own life to protect people around me. I had no idea how to do it, so started off by stabbing myself with a knife - I cut open my forearms, neck, still not dying...so I stabbed myself in my heart. Finally feeling tired...yet I could not sleep. So I decided to drag my half-dead body to greet my family one last time.

To dad: hug, I love you. - Love you too
To Mom: hug, I love you. - Love you too
To Lex (who was just sitting in the corner, looking rather like 18yr old Lex): bye bro, love you
To Grandpa: hug, I love you, quit smoking - Love you too, I'll smoke less, and swim more
To Grandma (she was cooking in the kitchen - somehow this is her kitchen in reality): hug, I love you. - I love you too, my dear grand daughter...and she slowly stroke and patted on my back...

Then that was the trigger, I started sobbing so hard that I woke up.
At least they'll all be safe.

Funny how this was a picture used by an old friend as screensaver a long time ago...

Drift XI. Family

No specific timeline

Location: An apartment supposedly shared by Sis Shuang, Grandpa Tian, and me

In the dream, sister and I were living with Grandpa. He was very ill, and we knew he didn't have much time left. He passed away, we were deeply saddened. However, when we came back from outside, sister touched grandpa, who lay still in bed - yet after the touch, he started coughing, and came back to life! I noticed the weird expression on uncle's face - his share of inheritance is gone again.

Sister and I cried our happy tears, and hugged Grandpa. I cried so hard that I woke up. It took me a good few minutes to realize what's really going on. I cried harder because in reality, Grandpa Tian & Sis Shuang both passed away. And uncle was someone I swore I'd never talk to again.

http://susancushman.com/mental-health-monday-happy-happy-monday/art-happy-sadness-favim-com-407510/

Drift X. The Love Letter

A dark evening

Location: Sun Yat-Sen University Student Activity Center

Funny enough, I never stopped fantasizing about him in reality or in my dreams - used to refer to him as "@". I haven't seen him since 2005 - by now it's 9 years ago. So in my dreams he's still a teenager, tall, slim, tanned, with some trace of naiveness and a lot of uncomfortable, acquired maturity. In this dream, we were young again, sitting together as classmates again.

He liked me in the dream, so when he quietly pushed two letters across the table to me, I knew what I could find in there. I only have time to open one letter, and my consciousness already started bursting in: it's just a dream! wake up now! you're waking up anyway!  My subconsciousness was screaming, trying to read the letter before reality flood into my mind...

But the excitement of reading the unknown accelerated the awakening process. I ended up lying in bed, furious, without a clue what was in that letter (love! his confession! must be!). Oh bye bye, till next dream.

柏原崇 in 情书

Drift IX. The Popular Teen

A rainy winter day

Location: some private high school in the US

I was a popular kid in the dream - everybody gossiped about my suitors, in fact everybody was my suitor, and all my actions were under spotlight in a favorable manner. I was late for choir practice, but the instructor was fine about it because I sang so well; I was then late for sketch class, and all my classmates helped me moving faster.

But, I already thrown up twice in between two art classes - I was pregnant, and the young version of me was racking her brains about what to do with that situation.

Reluctantly waking up... It was a heavenly feeling - to be a popular teen. At least in a dream too young and too late.

Photo: Emma Watson in The Bling Ring

Drift VIII. The Surgery

Unspecific timeline, seems like summer

Location: A hospital in Bangladesh

Admittedly in reality, I had let my mind drift a little bit about J. In this dream, J is quite into me, despite his long-term girlfriend. He was sitting through some training on my right, and his left hand was lightly brushing my right leg.

After the training, he mentioned that I was too tall for a girl of his preference, and that we should match better in height - so we went to this "couple surgery" to "stabilized" bone mass around our knees, and condense some of the structure.

Out of surgery, I know I've sacrificed a lot for him - my height! (note that I'm pretty short in reality). But when we got out of the surgery room, raising my painful legs I could not catch up with him. And he would not break up with his girlfriend.

In the end we just stood from afar, at each end the hospital, smiling at each other. 

Picture Credit: Charles M. Schulz

Drift VII. The Hunger Games

Early Jan, a rainy night

Location: Some twisted city

Beo and I both became animals (specifically, an ox and a horse). We somehow entered this voluntary experiment in a crowded room full of oxen and horses. The crazy scientist was recruiting volunteers: "$180 bucks will be paid, if an ox is willing to be eaten by a horse, under my supervision of course."

What?!! $180 to die?

But Dims really went! He crawl up to the corner of the room where there were machines to monitor his vital signs. A horse quickly followed him, and started to kick the back of his head at a very constant, mechanic, seemingly harmless manner. He looked fine in the beginning, but shortly his vital signs all dropped! And he was eaten by the horse afterwards - there and like that. I was...just an emotionless, by-standing horse, astonished by the scene, in a crowded room filled with oxen and horses...

A few minutes later, Beo (human shape) with 180 bucks in hand popped up, whispering: "I sure know how to fake death, huh?"

And I can't believe there is such a picture to be found......

Drift VI. The Wedding

Jan 2014

Location: Baltimore <--> Canton

Told the bf that I'm going to Canton for some business. But actually I was going back to get married with a college classmate of mine (funny how in reality we were just friends, never even had any fling or chemistry). In the dream the marriage was arranged, so I was not happy at all with the idea. But the thought of meeting my old college friends was comforting - oh Maggie, how I miss you.

Met the future husband at the wedding, he looked so bad now with his tobacco-dyed teeth, deeply-wrinkled forehead, chapped lips, weakly skinny body - he used to be a good-looking and kind-hearted lad back in the days. I instantly cringed and wanted to back out. As more and more guests showed up at the wedding, it came to my realization that they were all those folks I DISLIKE/HATE at college. But I needed to hug them and thank them for showing up.

Thankfully, Maggie was there too. She came back for me! Ever since UK, I've never saw her again. But it slowly became obvious that she came back to Canton just to meet an important public health figure. She would not run away with me from my arranged, utterly miserable wedding.

Frustrated, ignored, I came back to bf with a bruised heart: "I told you I was going to my wedding, have you forgotten?"

<Picture Credit: http://kampoengbentenan.wordpress.com/>

Drift V. The Epiphany

New Year

Location: Somewhere in Venice

Boating with some elderly Europeans, the weather was perfect. But they suddenly looked up to the sky and pointed to something apparently very shocking in an unpleasant way. I looked to the direction where they were pointing at - it was dark clouds rapidly creeping up and consuming the whole sky. Amongst the clouds, there was occasionally a gigantic 'hand' that was swinging down and smashing through the water, trying to look for something.

My friend reminded me to take off my gloves - because that 'hand' from the sky was looking for something that has human shape but not human radiation. I took it off, hiding myself from the searching web of the 'hand', suddenly kayaking through the water with perfect skill - I moved so fast, breaking the waves, and it was unprecedentedly exciting.

Half awake, the epiphany hit me: if the vicious cloud from the sky forms in the shape of a hand for its searching mission, it must mean that some supreme being created we humans in their shape...right?

Waking up, it's the same old philosophical question that I've been asking myself; or man has been asking himself since the beginning of time.

<Photo credit: Panoramio.com>